Why superheroes don't wear togas
by TakemyKryptonite
Summary: Kara and Kal bond over leather and fishnets.


"God damn."

"I know right?"

Kara nodded, unable to take her eyes off Catwoman's curves as the erstwhile master thief stood at a counter, making coffee.

Kara had been on Earth all of two months and had been looking for a costume to aid her in her heroic expeditions. So she approached her cousin and asked him for his help. He'd suggested that they hang out in the Watchtower cafeteria to observe the costumes that the other heroines wore to give her an idea of what designs she could go for. Kara had been hoping for a quick in and out, but she was now mesmerized, and Kal was only too happy to oblige her delay.

"Do you think it's uncomfortable?" Kara asked.

"Sure looks like it," Kal replied distractedly. "We should do this more often," he suggested.

"What, perv on our colleagues?" Kara smirked.

"Hey hey," he turned to look at Kara. "We're only appreciating their costumes in their true form. It's a perfectly acceptable thing to do."

"Sure, Kal, whatever you say," she chuckled. "I've never noticed it before, but why are the women's costumes _so_..."

"...sexual?" Kal completed her thought.

"Yeah! Look at Starfire's costume for instance. She's displaying so much of her body, she's basically wearing nothing! The things I want to do to her..." she trailed off.

"She is _wild_ ," Clark whispered.

Kara gasped, "Kal! You didn't!"

"Oh I most certainly _did_ ," he chuckled.

"Seriously, is there anyone on the league you haven't slept with?"

"Of course, Selina, Diana... um... uh..." he racked his brains trying to think of colleagues he hadn't slept with.

"Clark there are more than twenty women in the League!"

"You're just being jealous, Kara," he winked. "You could ask them out you know, they'd love to spend time with you."

"Really? Because I've had my eyes on Zee for a while."

"Oh, Zee's the absolute best. You know we dated for four years?"

"Really? You, Kal? Four years? That is impressive. Why'd you two split?"

"Decided we'd be better off as friends. Although," he lowered his voice, "I really miss the sex. There are things she can do with magic that would, literally, blow you away."

"Damn," Kara repeated.

"Speaking of magic, how about we get you a one-piece, that'd make a great costume, don't you think? It'll help distract the villains too."

"Oh ha ha, very funny, Kal. Nah, I'm sort of digging a skirt. Maybe a red skirt and a blue top?"

"Sounds interesting, I approve of the colour combination."

"Yeah..." she replied, distracted once more by Selina bending over to get something from a cupboard beneath the counter.

"How come you haven't slept with her yet? She looks like sex-on-wheels with all that leather and those curves. I could jump her right now," Kara whispered.

"Oh, Bruce has a crush on her, and I can't do that to him. Also, Kara, the next time you're going check out hot women, wear a bra," he smiled, waving in the general direction of her hardened nipples that showed through the thin material of the 'I love NY' T shirt she wore.

"Enjoy it, Kal, for this is closest you're getting to me," Kara joked, and added. "For the next few years at least."

"And after that?" Clark asked with a questioning look.

"There's no taboo between cousins on Krypton, and I won't make promises I know can't keep," she gave Kal a wink and got up to leave.

"Damn," he muttered, watching his hot cousin walk away. _God bless skin tight jeans_.

As Kara left the cafeteria, he spotted Diana walking in. She was wearing her ridiculously sexy armour that left little and yet everything to the imagination. He waved a hello and got up to leave, if he spent any time near her right now, he'd end up publicly embarrassing himself. He had yet to learn how to rein in his libido around Diana.

"Kal, I was looking for you! I haven't had a spar in ages! Come on, let's go," she motioned with her hand and walked out the way she'd come, without waiting for an answer. Kal sighed, he was so close to an escape, and followed her.

* * *

"How is Kara settling in?" she asked as they changed into workout clothes in the gym. Kal tried not stare as she removed her clothes and changed into a sports bra and yoga pants.

"Oh, she's doing fine. She's enjoying learning about Earth's culture."

"That's a good thing, right?" Diana asked as she tied her hair back in a high pony tail.

 _Great, literally the one thing could make her even sexier._

"Uh, yeah. I'm glad she's assimilating. I was afraid she would want to leave Earth for Daxam."

Diana smiled, straightening up. "Alright, I'm ready... to kick your ass."

"So that's how it's gonna be, huh princess? Bring it."

"You know what your problem is, Kal? You can't resist me," she gave him a sultry look and walked past his defences. She leaned into his ear and whispered. "And that's going to cost you."

With that, she kicked his legs out from underneath him and body slammed him to the rubber mats. She straddled him and smiled victoriously. "Get up casanova, don't make a lady wait on you."

Clark groaned. It was going to be a long day.


End file.
